Happy Easter

Today was just an eggsllent day all around...see what I did there ;-) First off, we went to church with my parents. My faith is something that I have been struggling with for the last couple of years, separating my spiritual identity from my parents. Today was the first time I have been to church in about three years, I have to say I really have missed it. My husband is not a spiritual man, and although I personally don't believe in everything that the church teaches, I belong there. I am hoping that in the next few weeks I can convince my husband to help me find a home church, but if not, I'll just go alone.

Second, we went to the annual Easter festivities at my grandmother's house. I loved watching my little angel walking around in her dress and being amazed to find these eggs hidden in bushes! It was awesome to have the family together, we also brought back some of our old traditions that "my generation" had outgrown. These include blowing bubbles, hiding eggs, and breaking out the lawn mower and wagon to take the kids for rides. Unfortunately, I had to pass down my driving duties to my younger cousin. Nothing like passing the torch to make you feel old!

One of the best things about today was that my brother in law Shane landed safely back in the states after a year-long tour in Afghanistan. Even though our relationship is rocky at best right now, I'm glad that he's back.

Like I said all and all it was a great day!

Here are some more old quotes from the myspace account :) Be warned, some of them are a little bit emo, several are song lyrics that just spoke to me at the time.

Sometimes I feel like I’m wasting all my time waiting for my life to start. I’d rather trip andfall then never try. I don’t want to waste another day while the world goes by. I wanna live it, I wanna breathe it, I wanna feel it for myself.

It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.

Lately I've been wishing I had one desire, something that would make me never want another. Something that would make it so that nothing matters. All would be clear then, but I guess I’ll have to settle for a few brief moments, and watch it all dissolve into a single second. Try to write it down into a perfect sonnet, or one foolish line. 

She was the kind who noted birthdays down in her little book with the vigor of someone who has often been forgotten

For a second there I thought you disappeared. It rains a lot this time of year, and we both go together if one falls down. I talk out loud like you're still around.

Stranger than your sympathy, and this is my apology. I've killed myself from the inside out and all my fears have pushed you out.

Some days go by, I wish I was famous. Or maybe religious, so I could go to heaven.

Well, you’re not awake but you haven’t been sleeping, and you hate God but you don’t believe in him, and you’re not scared but you’ve still got your eyes closed.

I never knew life could be like this. He is the one thing I've followed through with in my life, the one thing I didn't give up on. I am good at loving him. So, why do I still feel like I'm losing him?

And to this day when everything breaks, you are the anchor that holds me.

I'm either always fighting to hold on or fighting to let go.

Wish someone would tell me who to be because I'm ready. I'm ready to try anything. I'm dazzled by glamour and camera angles, the drama and swagger of fools. Sacrificed beauty once to chase after their parade, and spent my morning after crawling back to you. I want to be brand new. I want to trade in these wings. Mine don't work like yours do

She said the songs on the radio told her everything she ever needed to know.

There are moments when it's too quiet, particularly late at night or early in the mornings. That's when you know there's something lacking in your life. You just know.

I feel more comfortable talking to strangers than people I know. I believe this is because chances are, I'll never see them ever again and I feel like I can say anything I want. They don't know my past or what I've done. They can only judge me on who they're seeing right at that second. I'm the person I am now, not then. People I know don't see the difference.

I don't mean to run, but every time you come around, I feel more alive than ever and I guess it's too much. Maybe we're too young and I don't even know what's real. But I know I’ve never wanted anything so bad. I’ve never wanted anyone so bad

Spin a slow song. I don’t dance alone. Join me, why don’t you?  Give into the spark you’ve buried deep inside. Be my favorite melody and my favorite friend.